Fifteen Pieces of Junk

Of the following 20 items, 15 were actually in my car yesterday when I cleaned it out:

1. A cane.

2. My Disneyland Critter Country jacket.

3. A t-shirt featuring Popeye.

4. A definitive list of everyone I have ever had sex with.

5. Bundles of my old high school newspaper.

6. A Simpsons-themed windshield sun blocker thingy.

7. A Captain Crunch-themed windshield sun blocker thingy.

8. A patriotic umbrella.

9. A bloody butcher knife.

10. Unmailed letters to Sara and Meg.

11. A scarf.

12. A Hello Kitty lucha libre mask.

13. A handicap parking placard.

14. An orange safety cone.

15. An Incredible Hulk locker.

16. Hanging file folders.

17. A book about how women should treat their husbands.

18. Collected editions of Little Lulu comics.

19. A Norah Jones CD.

20. A cat.

New Puppy

Her name is Patty, and she is adorable. I don’t like English Bulldogs as a whole, but there is something special about this one I can’t deny. Patty rocks, and I just had to share her with you. However, this is by no means signaling the end of my posting hiatus.